The Roleplaying Experience, Part 5

Guest Starring

Fred the Phantom Shitter

Cheeze-it brand snack food

Matt: Cheese-its are good.

Chris: where did you get that new box of cheese-its? You better gimmie some of those!

Gary: those are mine... mine i tell you! CHEESE

DM: You all smell something vile in your camp.

Gary: that must be me, im pretty ripe down south if you know what i mean.

Tyler: it better not be no shit-monster.

Matt: Watch out for flying corn.

Tyler: i have protection from core +2.

Kyle: I smell something, and its my fucking feet.

::gary has his hand in his pants::

Gary: it looks like relish, and smells like taint.. Booyah!

Chris: oh sick.

Matt: Dont touch me with that shit.

::kyle kicks gary away from him::

Brian: We are out of beer.

DM: didnt you just have a 24 pack? damn son.

Brian: its okay, there is another 24 in my room.

Tyler: holy shit man, bring it in here.

Brian: no man, thats all i got left to keep me through the night. Hows a nigga supposed to keep a buzz with no beer?

Gary: Fucking toasted almonds.

Chris: I could go for some coke right now. ((sniff))

::Matt Mateka comes back in the room::

Matt M.: Take me home right now gary.

Gary: fuck you, walk home.

Matt M.: Take me home right now or ill kill you motherfucker!

Gary: Go home fag, i never said i would take you home.

Matt M.: fuck you man! fuck you im going to kill you!

Tyler: can i kick him in the balls?

ALL: YES!

::matt m. runs away in fear screaming for his testicles::

Gary: lanky motherfucker. His sister is hot tho.

Chris: she has a big nose man.

Gary: she got a nose job man.. id fuck it.

Matt: i fucked a slut in tennesee. I busted it in her and i could be the illigitimate father of twin girls.

ALL: what?

Brian: yeah man.. and Noell watched too.

Matt: i like to fuck sluts. At least ive got some Brian, you never even got your nut off with heidy!

ALL: HAHAHAHAHAhahaha....

Brian: So. its not all about the nut. I tossed her salad too.

Chris: i like to lick the asshole.

DM: the shit smell is getting much stronger.

Chris: Gary, get your hands out of your pants!

Gary: man, i cant help this. Its all wet down there. here smell!

Chris: get that shit out of here!

DM: as the smell intensifies, you see 4 poo monsters circling Tyler.

Tyler: fuck this man, im climbing up in the tree.

DM: you look up in the tree and see.... the monkey! Matt, the monkey flings poo right in your eye!

Gary: thats what im talking about.

Tyler: fuck man! what the fuck!

Kyle: im runin'.

DM: Tyler, the shit beasts enguage you in combat!

Chris: im running away, fuck this. That is some stank shit.

gary: im gonna ill with the monkey, hes a pimp.

Brian: I gotta take a shit.. speak of the devil.

Tyler: this is jewish!

::after another long and played out fight:

Tyler: I didnt die! yes!

DM: thats because all they wanted was a hit and run!

Chris: who knew the monkey controlled the poo monsters. hahaha...

Matt: it was funny when you got your ass raped Ty, i never thought he had a dil on him!

Tyler: shut the fuck up bitches! at least i didnt die!

Gary: that was no dil in your ass, it was my cock motherfucker!

Andrea: Chris, can we go home now?

Chris: your kicked out of the house bitch.

Andrea: okay, see you at home.

::she leaves::

Kyle: What do i see when i get back to camp?

DM: you see tyler bent over with a 2 foot long black dil up his ass, and the monkey is giving him a reach-around!

ALL: hahahahhahahahaha

Tyler: fuck this shit man.. anyone wanna goto 711? Ill buy youa sobe major if you take me?

DM: maybe later.. Im not thirsty. I still my beer here to work on. Oh by the way, tyler, one of your legs and your dick is missing.

Tyler: FUCKING SHIT this is so fucking jewish! fuck this nigger shit. Fucking jewish motherfucker. Im not going to play unless i have my cock back.

Gary: i made a necklace out of it, and im wearing it around my fucking neck bitch!

Tyler: ill kill you bitch! ILL KILL YOU!

Kyle: give me a gun and $50, ill kill anyone.

DM: go postal niggah.

::we all take off to 711, and possibly taco bell::