Colin: The man behind Bruno.

Bruno: the man with no gun.

 

The History Of Bruno

Vietnam

 

Our Friend Colin has been tormented his whole life by a big nigger, named Bruno. It all started when Bruno was born, he killed his mama. He stuck that bitch right in her shit. His daddy was like "you son of a bitch!" and he stuck Bruno in his shit. That only pissed bruno off so he stuck him in his shit and killed his ass with the ambilical cord around the neck.

We really dont know much about Bruno's child hood, but colin told me that they went to middle school together, and he killed his first grade teacher. he was like "why you make me do work?" and he knocked that dumb bitch out, and they wouldnt let him come to school anymore.

When Bruno hit 18, he decided to go into the military. He joined the army and Colin got stuck in his same platoon.

One day when Colin was eating steak and drinking beer, some goddamn gook came out of the rice patty and was like "onya yonya....ya!" Colin was like, "bitch! come up in my face when im eatin' steak!" so Colin stuck his ass in the slant eyed face and he hit the turf. Then he took out his shot gun while the gook stuggled on the ground, and he shot his ass 125 times with deer slugs.

Bruno didnt take lightly to gooks. One day when Colin and Bruno were in the jungle, a gook came out and shot bruno right in the chest. Bruno was like.. "why you gotta be going and shooting me?" and he clocked that slanteyed mother fucker in his gook face. "dats what you git, tryin to shoot my ass" and he stuck him again. Afetr his hand got sore, he took Colin's shotgun and threw it at a gook. "Bruno, why dont you use the damned gun?" "man.. fuck dats, i got two hands man. fuck dem gooks."

They even tried to ambush Bruno one day, trying to sneak up on him. He was walking threw the jungle one day and he saw a bunch of gooks.. he just ran over and started hittin' those bitches in the face. "fuck that shit man.. ambushing mother fuckers, ill fuck your gook ass"

One thing he never told anyone man.... Bruno ate shit. I mean, fresh out of the hole, cow shit. One day Colin was about to eat some steak and bruno had some shit and he was eating it. "Bruno man, you want some steak?" "naw man, i got shit right here." and he chowed the whole turd in one bite. Tough as nails i tell you.

Once there was this bunch of gooks inside this base, and their unit could not get into the damned place. Bruno ran in there, clocking gooks and slopes till he got to the general and he stuck his ass right in the jaw and knocked his ass out. then he bit the bitch in the jugular. "bitch.. " he said spitting on him. he got on the microphone and tuned it to his units frequency. "aight bitches, come on in, this place is clean."

 

Back to Fort Myers

 

When Colin got back to fortmyers Florida, he saw a couple of his old friends. "yo man! whats up niggah!" "not much man.. just pimping some hoes.. " his boyz remarked. "hoes?"

From there it started. Colin never thought he would ever get into the buisness of hoes. He found out quickly it was a very profitable buisness. He made almost $50,000 the first night alone, not bad. Slowly his area increased as the need for hoes was crucial at this time.

He was out just chillin at 41 and collage and someone stoped by to get hoes. "bitch, in my car." the man said, pulling the bitch in there. Colin could do nothing about it but stare. Then he knew that the perfect man to protect his hoes, was the one and only Bruno.

Colin flew Bruno back from Nam so he could be his bodyguard of the hoes and bitches. He knew how to take care of them too! he got what he wanted, when he wanted it. His favorite disquise was a black beard and a santa outfit, which he wore in the middle of smmer, ringing a salvation army bell. "gimie yo money bitch"

 

 

-Retold by Colin, the vietnam veteran and pimpdaddy.

 

 

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